Saturday, January 30, 2010

Sugar Crisis

No I haven't disappeared. I've been sick. Has anyone noticed there's a SERIOUS sugar crisis in Oman? I went to SIX supermarkets yesterday and no sugar. I'm not a sugar fan, but I had to bake cookies for guests. What's up with the sugar? I haven't noticed anything in the newspaper.
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Rania and I are going out tonight. We'll go sugar-searching and maybe I'll convince her to get off her **** and start blogging again :-)

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

More Than Just Living

"يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ إِنَّا خَلَقْنَاكُمْ مِنْ ذَكَرٍ وَأُنْثَى وَجَعَلْنَاكُمْ شُعُوبًا وَقَبَائِلَ لِتَعَارَفُوا إِنَّ أَكْرَمَكُمْ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ أَتْقَاكُمْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَلِيمٌ خَبِيرٌ "
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I've been thinking a lot lately... trying to figure out where I'm heading in life. I'm healthy, I have a wonderful family, I love Islam, I live in a beautiful country, I love my job, I'm always active and busy. I wake up every morning, contemplate my life, and then ask my bedroom wall 'Now what? What's next?'.
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It's not enough to just be satisfied and continue to live. I've always felt like I need to do more. I need to give more. Sometimes when you watch the news, or read real stories about other people, you may become overwhelmed or start thinking that there's so much happening in the world, and you're just one tiny grain of sand on that beach. The world is such an amazing place. 6 Billion people sharing this one small planet. We each affect the lives of others everyday in ways we cannot even begin to comprehend. We're all different in so many ways, yet we're all the same. We all have to wake up in the morning, face life, go to work, earn a living, take care of our families, deal with birth, marriage, death, illness, happiness, sadness, love, pain, ... and we all go to bed at night thinking about the events of our day. .
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Is it enough to just live your life, pray, read Quran for your own benefit, work towards your own salvation and hope to get into heaven? It's not enough to just help yourself. The world needs us. Others needs our help. I've been following the news from Haiti after the earthquake several times a day. The situation is so terrible that if you even think about it and imagine yourself as a person living in Haiti, you probably wouldn't be able to sleep at night. I almost murdered my colleague yesterday who said 'Why are America & Europe helping Haiti? Why are all these Western countries running to the rescue? There must be an American conspiracy in there somewhere'. I managed to remain calm and not throw my stapler or punch at him. An earthquake has damaged their country, killed hundreds of thousands of people, left millions homeless, where the HELL is a conspiracy supposed to fit into all this? It's a crisis. If the world doesn't run to the rescue, then we are not human. ..
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If an earthquake hit Oman, damaging the whole country. If Salalah or Muscat were completely leveled (i.e every building collapsed) .. if we had over 250,000 dead (that's double the population of Salalah), and the whole country was homeless..... how would we react? How would we deal with it? We'd be so overwhelmed with the tragedy that we wouldn't even know what to do. Your whole life collapsing around you. Your sense of security completely lost. Would the rest of the world not run to the rescue? Would we not expect other countries to help us? OF COURSE. Regardless of political borders and passports, we are all humans, brothers and sisters belonging to one country called Earth. In times of need, we help one another. We must. .
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A fellow blogger sent me a blog written by a 22 year-old American girl, Molly, who left her safe home in June 2009, left her family and friends and went to Haiti to volunteer for one year with children who suffer from mental and physical disabilities. She had been writing regularily about her experiences in Haiti and the children she was working with. Her last post was December 30, 2009. She was a victim of the earthquake. Her body was found among the rubble of the children's centre she was working at. That's just one story from the millions of stories around the world about people who are trying to make a difference. Do you think there's a conspiracy behind a 22 year old girl who donated one year of her life to helping others? Of course not. She was just a good person who wanted to do 'more' in this world. 'More'. ... More than just living.
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I've been thinking about this lately because it upsets me sometimes when my friends show no interest at all in the rest of the world. It's as if the rest of the planet doesn't exist. There are people who feel connected to the world as a 'whole' and who are able to look at the big pictures. Those people are usually well-travelled and have seen life beyond the borders of Oman and Dubai. .
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In fact, I think most of Salalah are quite happy living their own lives, deep in their society and families, without feeling any need to connect with the rest of the world. They're so zoomed in to their own little lives (yes little) that they are unable to pull back and look at the big picture. Where they stand in the universe. Where they stand in life. It saddens me to know that people around me are so pre-occupied with the tiny details of their day to day life that they are unable (not just unwilling, but unable) to look at the big picture of their life, let alone 'life' in general. I know this is the case with many people around the world, and I'm not generalizing. I know some very enlightened Dhofaris who have travelled, gone out of their way to learn more, and who have taken the extra mile in life and feel a sense of belonging to this planet. However, they remain a minority. There are very few of them.
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Then again, sometimes I don't blame them. They haven't been taught to think about the rest of the world. They haven't been told "You can do anything you set your mind to" by their parents. They haven't been encouraged to travel and learn. The concept of volunteering and 'giving' to strangers, and small acts of kindness doesn't exist in our little society. Our society doesn't support breaking out of tradition. By tradition here, I mean sticking to the tribe through good and bad. Never moving away from Salalah or trying to build your own life. Collectivistic thinking. Collectivistic society. It's VERY hard in Salalah to have your own life, and to try and make a difference. They are afraid of change and when they adopt change it's more often negative.
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Do you think I'm being negative? My friend was criticized by her family for trying to help someone with a physical disability. Their reason "That child is not related to us. What will people say about you? You have a reputation. Stop volunteering". This isn't a rare case. I've seen it over and over again. Dhofari families feel very uneasy about volunteering and 'being out there' helping others. They're still VERY uneasy about people with special abilities & needs. Is it because they're uneducated? Or because our society doesn't support that kind of thing? Are they afraid? Afraid of what? A child in a wheelchair who just wants someone to play with? An abandoned baby at the hospital who just wants to be held? Why is it so taboo?! Where is humanity?
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And all this crap about 'reputation' and being 'seen'. (ooh .. shivers ... I've been SEEN!). Rubbish. Salalah NEEDS more volunteer work programs. We don't have any. It's very hard to volunteer at the centre for children with special abilities & needs. The only other centre is the centre for the blind, which is in terrible shape. The hospital won't allow volunteers into the abandoned babies' section. I know some British women used to volunteer there but they won't let anyone else in unless you have strong wasta. People need to be given the opportunity to help. A lot of time is being wasted everyday in this town by young people who don't have anything useful to do. We need a well-run active youth centre where young men and women alike can sign up to volunteer on a regular basis. Simple things like working with children, teaching mentally disabled children how to swim, helping children with learning difficulties, cleaning up beaches, planting trees, volunteering in schools, running awareness campaigns, and just doing good in society. WHY NOT?
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I can't do it alone. Help. Today go out of your way to help three random people. Small acts of kindness. Throw a pebble in the water and wait for the ripple effect. Life is too short just to 'live' it like a normal person. Go out of your way. I know my post is random. The result of many years of thinking. If my thoughts aren't organized, forgive me. I'm basically writing what comes to my mind without thinking about coherence.
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This post is dedicated to my friend Shahrazad, a speech therapist who makes a difference in this world every day of her life by helping people overcome their speech problems after accidents, strokes, and many other cases. She is an englightened person. I want her to go back to writing. Perhaps this post will inspire her.
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PS (if you want to help in any way, look at Molly's blog and see how you can donate to Haiti)

Friday, January 15, 2010

Eclipse

Sadly, I missed the first solar eclipse of the millenium that occured this morning at around 10:00 a.m Oman time. Sleep is precious. I had prepared my set of heavy film-negative goggles that make it safe to watch, and I was kind of excited. The last one happened when I was a child, and I remember my mother making the glasses for us using old film negative, and I remember waiting for it to happen. It was so amazing. The majestic sun disappeared and turned black in broad daylight. Of course, many superstitious people are terrified of solar eclipses, but all I can say is 'Subhan Allah'. Our universe is amazing and inspiring.
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Did any of you watch it? Anyone remember the eclipse that happened back in early 1992?

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

What the hell are they thinking??!

Read UD (Muscat Confidential's) latest post here. VERY VERY DISTURBING. What has the world come to? The brother of the current ruler of UAE, Sheikh Issa (Sheikh my a**) NOT guilty????? Rape a man, torture him, beat him, stuff his face with sand, cover his wounds in salt, shoot at him, rape him some more, ON VIDEO seen by the whole world on every possible channel from CNN to BBC, and in the end walk away a free man because you were under the influence of drugs and thus not in your right mind???? I did not sleep last night.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Polygamy = Less Divorce?

I'm officially on fire this morning, even though it's chilly outsides and my fingers are cold. I was reading my fellow blogger Reality's latest post titled "Less Divorce More Second Wives" . Our dear friend & controversial journalist Saleh Al Shaibany who writes scandalous articles for UAE newspaper 'The National' (remember my article on Omani Zombies? Yeah, that was him), published an article where he suggests that divorce rates have fallen in Oman as more men take second wives. You can read the article here.
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Do you mean to tell me, Mr. Saleh, that polygamy is the solution for Oman's social problems? Pain and broken families is going to solve the divorce problem?? Well Hallelujah! The perfect equation! I have seen so many families torn apart by fathers taking on second wives. Polygamy doesn't work anymore. Yes, there are some rare cases where men know how to treat their wives equally, but the majority of polygamists screw up.
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He's very good at writing articles without expressing his own opinion. The people he interviewed for this article do not represent the majority of married couples in Oman, that's for sure, and he even interviewed a marriage counsellor who had very little sympathy for first wives. “In my opinion, women have only themselves to blame for letting themselves go. They need to look after themselves and stay attractive,” Safiya Suleiman, a 58-year-old marriage counsellor, said.
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EXCUSE ME?
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Women need to look like tarts in order to 'maintain' their husbands? While taking care of a house and kids and a full-time job sometimes? Men are uncontrollable ? Is that what she's trying to say? And is this Safiya Suleiman really a marriage counsellor?? If yes, then perhaps Oman needs to hire more sensible humans to take on such positions.
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Anyway, I think this article is nonsense. Saleh wrote "According to statistics from the ministry of religious affairs, the divorce rate in Oman dropped by 12 per cent in 2008 from the previous year. At the same time, the number of men taking second wives increased by more than 20 per cent"..... Has anyone noticed it's 2010? Why is he presenting us with 2008 statistics? What about 2009? In my opinion, there is no relationship whatsoever between polygamy and divorce rates.
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I should have read the article 'after' my cup of coffee. Now I'm simply annoyed. Not a good way to start my day. I have fresh flowers in my office, though. They should cheer me up.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

A New Beginning

" To make an end is to make a Beginning." -T. S. Eliot .
My first post of 2010. Wow. What a year/decade this has been for me. I remember New Year 2000 very well. I was in grade 9 and I had a math exam the next day, so I spent the entire evening studying and trying to stay awake for the Millenium. I finally did make it, and was blessed to see 1999 become 2000. Ten years have passed and I took time out on Thursday to reflect on all the major events in my life. I finished middle school, started high school, started painting, received a scholarship, went to university, studied like mad, expanded my horizons, fell in love with learning all over again, travelled a lot, graduated, got my drivers' license, bought my first car, started work, studied more, and this year I started my blog.
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A lot of other things happened obviously, but I can't blog about them. I feel blessed and at peace with myself and with the world. I sat on the beach with a friend on New Year's Eve. It was a full beautiful moon (lucky me!) so I did manage to get a photo of it. It was so perfect that New Year's was on a weekend, with a full moon (Dhofaris love full moons). There were hundreds of people on the beach relaxing and waiting to welcome the new year in a peaceful way.
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Blog-wise, it has been a wonderful year for me. I can't remember why I suddenly decided to start blogging. I remember thinking to myself 'Who's going to read my thoughts?', and was blown away by the number of readers, comments, and emails I have received since I started blogging in April. It has been quite over-whelming at times, and I apologize to anyone who wrote to me and hasn't received a response yet. I try my best to keep up with the emails, but if you knew how many emails I receive a day you'd forgive me. However, I do remember receiving an email from a young expat wife who was moving to Salalah and she wanted to know about life here, etc. I searched my entire inbox for her email and couldn't find it. So, if you're reading this, please write me again and I'll provide as many details as you want. Special thanks to my FIRST TWO READERS! Faith & Sting. I still have no idea how they found my blog, but they did and they inspired me to keep writing.
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Ok, enough sentimental thoughts. I wanted to let you all know that I was privileged enough to have dinner with fellow blogger Reality in Oman last week. Our meeting was not planned but it all worked out well and we ended up spending 4 hours together. She is a fascinating & enlightened young woman, and I was very lucky to meet her. The topics she blogs about are always intriguing and thought-provoking. She is quite intense, but also has a quiet sense of humor. Meeting fellow writers has been one of 2009's greatest gifts to me. I have met some very interesting and enlightened bloggers over the past few months. We inspire one another to continue writing & I don't feel the pressure and fear of them exposing who I am because we're all in the same boat together.
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Do you believe in New Year resolutions? Do you believe in opening a new page and giving yourself the chance to start over? If yes, what kind of resolutions and plans have you come up with?